Here’s an article I want to share with you from today’s Brainerd Dispatch - it’s titled “As a donor, Fred keeps on living.” It’s a great story about a young man named Fred Powers who had too short a life and had made the generous decision to be an organ and tissue donor. I encourage you to read the story in it’s entirety.
What I want to point out, however, is a short excerpt from the middle of the article:
A LifeSource representative approached Bonnie and Randy, asking if they’d be willing to donate Fred’s organs. Randy remembered several years earlier that Fred had asked his dad if he was an organ donor. Randy told his son that he was, and Fred seemed interested in doing the same. But nothing else was spoken between them on the issue and his parents weren’t sure if Fred had gone through and had “donor” listed on his driver’s license.
Randy sent one of Fred’s friends to the parking lot to retrieve Fred’s wallet from Randy’s truck. They were relieved when they turned Fred’s license over and it read “donor.”
“It took a huge pressure off of us,” said Randy.
It’s worth repeating Randy’s words – “It took a huge pressure off of us.” This is the power of making a lifetime decision about donation.
Please take a moment to get the facts about donation and make a decision, then let your family know. Encourage them to do the same. Nothing in the world can make the tragedy of losing a loved one easier, nor can donation take the sting away from the grief-filled months and years ahead. Randy’s words reflect the relief, the comfort and the knowledge that they were supporting what Fred wanted.
I arrived last evening to relieve my co-worker John of his duties in the booth at the Sturgis Bike Rally. It was my assumption that I would fine John tired and ready to ride out of town. In reality he was energized and eager to keep going. After arriving on the strip and experiencing the views of thousands of bikes and people (ask me about some of those later), John’s energy was passed along to me. I have to admit at first I was a little nervous about this adventure but was pleasantly surprised with the kindness of everyone here. One example of that was the generosity of over half of our booth visitors today. As we handed our green wrist bands out and were in the process of asking if they were donors, they would reach for their wallets to give us a cash donation. I have not experienced that anywhere I have gone before. These bikers have big hearts. Speaking of big hearts – I met Matt from St. Louis Missouri. Matt was approximately 13 years old. He came running to our booth with a big smile on his face and said; “I know exactly what this is about”. Matt’s mother told me he did a very large project on the lifesaving gifts of organ donation and takes every opportunity he gets to talk about it with family and friends. As he talked to me in excitement, other adults stood by to listen to what he had to say. Matt was an example of how important our high school education is.
Matt a great advocate for donation
Lastly, John told me last night that Lorenzo Lamas was in a booth right outside of our door. For those of you that do not know him he was the star of the shows Falcon Crest and Renegade. My trip would not be complete without meeting him so I went on a search. I found him and was told he was selling t-shirts for the Make a Wish Foundation. After adding another t-shirt to my collection and having him sign a picture for me I went back to the booth. I decided to go back for more visit with the intention of talking with him about donation. I asked him if he was a supporter and his response was “absolutely, I cannot use my organs after death”. He proudly put the wrist band on and took a picture with our volunteer Kim. Yes, that made my day.
Lorenzo Lamas and Kim Morsching
Until tomorrow – good night and thank you to all of our volunteers for making this outreach possible. Cindy
This eloquently written post was authored by my colleague, Cindy Thurmes. Cindy is LifeSource’s special events coordinator and took the time to share with all of us about a personal – and recent – connection to donation.
As a special events planner at LifeSource, I have the privilege of working with many donor families and recipients through the events that I plan. No matter what our jobs are at LifeSource, we are driven by their stories, their tears and their strength. Sometimes the lifesaving gifts of donation come into our personal lives also. That is what I experienced last week.
On July, 18, 2009, my daughter’s friend Army Ranger Ben Kopp died from injuries he sustained in Afghanistan while protecting the lives of his 6 fellow soldiers. Ben was a fun and adventurous individual in high school who would do anything for anyone. This carried over in his life as an Army ranger. Ben served several tours in Iraq and was assigned to Afghanastan in May.
On July 10th Ben’s unit was involved in a firefight with the Taliban where he put himself in the line of fire so that his fellow soldiers could get out of a location that they were backed into. Ben was shot in the knee which severed an artery and lead to his brain not receiving the oxygen it needed. Ben was cared for by medics in the field and then in a hospital in the middle east followed by a stop at Landstuhl Medical Center in Germany and finally the Walter Reed Medical Center in Washington D.C. Ben also became a hero after death by becoming an organ donor. Miraculously, after saving 6 of his fellow solders lives, he saved 6 more lives through organ donation.
I had not been to a soldier’s funeral before and do have to say that the ceremony of it with a Blackhawk helicopter flying overhead, hundreds of patriot guards standing by with flags, the stories from his fellow soldiers and commanders, and the sound of bagpipes in the air brought out emotions I did not know I had. What I did know was that Ben was clearly a hero in so many ways and his actions were contagious. I looked across the room Friday night at his visitation and Saturday at his funeral and saw all of the people with the green wrist bands on supporting donation. It occurred to me we may not be the hero Ben was as a soldier but we can all agree to be the hero Ben was after his death by saying yes to organ donation. Ben’s heroism and his family’s desire to see it through on his long journey home from across the world will always be an inspiration to me.
We made it to the rally and have been talking to people from all over the world. We gave out over 500 wristbands and had many different conversations. It is amazing the amount of people that when asked if they were an organ donor said “Yes I am, don’t need them when I am gone.”
For the morning crew we had two of the South Dakota Lions members who did not rest in asking the question of ”Are you a donor?” to those that happened to walk by. One of them named Bob, seemed to have his own gravitational pull for those who came near to him and every one walked away with a green wristband and knew what it meant. We also had Don and Christine who are the parents of Gabriel. Don donated one of his kidneys to Gabriel and now Gabriel is a 2 year old bundle of energy and doing quite well. Brandy Thompson from the South Dakota Lion’s Eye Bank also volunteered and took the message out into the streets handing out bracelets to folks as she passed by.
Paul and Christine (recipient parents and living donor) along with Brandy Thompson from South Dakota Lions Eye Bank
In the afternoon Doug and Carol Pavel took over the booth and the wristbands started flying again. During the many different short conversations, laughter was heard and powerful moments were shared. As Doug and Carol shared their son Brian’s story and how he was a donor and ultimately how helpful it has been to them to know that people had received the gift of life out of such a tragic event. We stayed to the last moment to hand out as many wristbands and talk to just one more person.
Doug and Carol Pavel and myself posing for a picture at the end of the shift
The grand experiment of coming out to Sturgis so far has been a success.
Last weekend I attended a wedding with my family. At the reception we sat with another family who had small kids. As we started to talk with with the required introductions – such as name, how do you know the couple and so on - we talked about what we do. I shared that I work for LifeSource, at which point Tabitha spoke up and told me that she was a donor sister and that her mother had received a lot of support from our organization.
Tabitha’s sister died more than 15 years ago and she spoke very passionately and powerfully about the support they received and the relationships that were created because of the gift of life. She spoke about meeting the parents of the recipients and how important it was to her mother to meet the mother of one of her sister’s recipients. She shared that they both had anxiety about the meeting, such as the recipient’s feeling of guilt of having a surviving child and so on.
As Tabitha continued to talk she gave example after example about how donation had changed her family’s life. I could see in her face how much it had impacted her and the excitement about talking to someone who understood the process and not having to explain it. It seemed that she may not have told these stories for a while and telling them to me was encouraging both of us. She talked about her family becoming family friends with the recipients and their families, even flying to visit one family by herself when she was 16. She talked about keeping in contact with the donation coordinators and how that had impacted them.
Connections that are created by the generous giving of the gift of life are powerful, both for the donor’s family and the recipient’s. Each side can gain healing from being in a relationship with the other, and families are connecting more often. Around 10% of LifeSource donor families have direct contact with the recipients of their loved ones gifts; not too long ago it was rare and unheard of. As we continue to talk with donor families, recipients and transplant professionals we can increase those numbers and there will be more stories shared over a meals at at receptions talking about the power of giving the gift of life and the connections it creates.
This morning I was going through the mail at my desk when I opened a letter from a donor mom. Enclosed was a program from a ceremony at which the donor’s family awarded the first of an annual scholarship in honor of their son. As I looked through the newspaper clippings, the program, and read a copy of the speech, I was very impressed with their commitment to continuing the legacy of their son and their family. This family is able to share the positive traits of their son with a much larger group on an annual basis as they give scholarships to high school students who will, hopefully, go on to pursue their dreams.
Many times we talk about the gift of life given at the time of donation – the gift of organs or tissues that saves lives of those waiting for a transplant And this is a critical message to share. Over 100,000 people are waiting for a life saving transplant and that is just organ alone. Many more people will require a tissue transplant at some point in their lives.
To me, though, the amazing thing about our donor families is that they do not stop with the donation. They do not say, “my family has given enough.” Our donor families find ways to continue to give, to further the legacy of the beloved person that has died. This is done through a variety of ways: establishing scholarships, softball touranments, telling their story to high school students in driver’s ed. These are people that understand what it means to give – to give life, to give hope, to give possibilities. I am constantly encouraged by knowing, caring for, and serving this group as they try to do the same for their community and continue the legacy of their loved one.
The following post is courtesy of Mark Johnson, one of our hospital liaisons, and is a testament to the generosity of donors and the power of remembrance.
On Memorial Day a friend and I were checking in for a round of golf and one of the guys behind the counter asked me what my relationship was to LifeSource. After explaining my role with the organization I asked him if he was a donor family member and he mentioned that his daughter had died in 1990 and was able to donate her heart and both kidneys. He asked that I stop by after my round so we could talk a little longer.
During our conversation later in the morning he thanked me for what LifeSource does and told me that losing his daughter was the cruelest blow he and his wife have ever experienced. He also mentioned that when they think about their daughter they rarely think about how she died but more frequently remember that she was able to help other people. He said he doesn’t recall a lot of details about the hospitalization but clearly remembers the conversation about donation, and that he and his wife never hesitated to say yes knowing that their daughter would be an answer to another family’s prayer.
19 years later and he was obviously still deeply impacted by their decision to donate. Talking with this father I realized that the donor families we have worked with in the past, whether it was last week or 19 years ago, are affected forever by their interactions with LifeSource.
To meet a donor Dad from so many years ago and to have another chance to honor their decision and their daughter’s gift was a wonderful way to celebrate Memorial Day!
Although the Tournament of Roses Parade was nearly three months ago, the impact is far-reaching – especially for the families who participate in memory of their loved one.
For the past two years, families from the Upper Midwest have been honoring their loved ones as part of the Donate Life Float in the parade. The float is magnificent each year, and in a few short months the theme of the 2010 Donate Life float will be announced. I have no doubt it will once again be an award winner.
In 2008, Wyman and Marna Johnson participated in the parade in memory of their daughter, Karlynn. Here’s their story, previously written up as part of a brochure:
In October 2005 Wyman and Marna faced every parent’s worst nightmare. During surgery their only daughter, Karlynn, suffered a massive stroke from which she could not recover. Karlynn was only 28 years old and left behind an infant son, husband and many family and friends. “When the topic of donation was first brought up, we didn’t know what to think,” said Wyman, “one day Karlynn was healthy and the next she was gone. We needed to know what Karlynn would have wanted.”
Karlynn’s parents found their answer when they looked in her purse and found her driver’s license. There, clearly marked, Karlynn had made the decision to be an organ and tissue donor. That was an answer to their prayers, Wyman and Marna say, because Karlynn had already made her decision and they didn’t have to decide for her. “Finding ‘donor’ on Karlynn’s license made all the difference,” Marna says. Karlynn’s gifts of donation saved the lives of five people and her legacy continues to inspire others.
Karlynn’s birthday was earlier this month; she would have been 32. In memory of their daughter, Wyman and Marna put together a video of still photographs from their time in Pasadena last year decorating Karlynn’s floragraph. The Johnson’s shared:
We are ‘celebrating’ Karlynn today! Thirty-two years ago today, March 11, 1977, God loaned Karlynn to us. We miss her greatly every day, and even more on special days, but know that we will be together with her forever some day. We will always cherish memories of our sweetheart.
I hope you enjoy these amazing pictures set to music as much as I did. It’s a beautiful tribute to a woman who did so much for so many – both in life and in her death.
Next month LifeSource is welcoming one of this year’s floragraph families, Ruth and Ron Laumer, to share their experience traveling to Pasadena and participating in the float. I hope to share more about their story with you then.
Our mission statement is that LifeSource pledges to be the bridge between the loss of life and the gift of life through organ and tissue donation. This image of the bridge is one we use quite frequently. As you know, in order for there a bridge to be functional there must be many supports. The bridge between donation and transplantation has many of these supports, one important one being transplant recipients. I do not want to dismiss the importance of the gift by the donors and their families – they are the ones who begin the bridge. I’m focusing on recipients right now because I have known many who have also been a strong part of the bridge, either by raising awareness through living their lives as they wait for transplant or sharing the message of donation as a volunteer after they’ve received their gift of life.
Part of my job includes facilitating correspondence between donor family members and recipients. A few weeks ago I received a gift sent by a recipient to the family of her donor. This gift was an exquisitely handcrafted quilt and pillowcases. As I took it out of the package it just kept coming and coming and as I looked at it I could see the love and appreciation that was poured into it. The fine stitching that left no visible seams, the vision to see it as one large work of art and the desire to give back to someone that had given so much. That gift was a support to the donor family. I talked with a family member later and she appreciated the beauty, time and effort the recipient poured into it. It was also a support to the staff here at LifeSource, who could see the beauty and time and effort that it took to create such a masterpiece. Through seeing it they were also encouraged in the work they do, to see the circle be completed from donor and family to recipient and then recipient to donor family. Together we all support the bridge that facilitates giving the gift of life through organ and tissue donation and transplantation.
The quilt given by the recipient to the donor family
This is a close up of the detail photographed at the actual size of the quilt.
There are many stories that cross my desk as I work with the families of our donors. Stories that start with a tragedy and while that tragedy does not go away, donation can bring some positive out of the ruins. This is one of those stories, it the meeting of one donor family and the recipient of their son/brother’s heart. Brian died as the result of a work related incident on November 1, 2007. They first heard from Dick, (the heart recipient) 2 months after Brian died and he received his transplant. After many letters both parties decided to share their contact information with each other. This is where Doug and Carol pick up the story:
We shared each others’ personal information on a recent Tuesday morning. By that afternoon we received a phone call from Dick that lasted almost an hour. E-mails were exchanged that evening with Dick asking if he could meet us that upcoming weekend as he was flying to our area on business and could stop on the way. Schedules were set up, plane tickets were bought, and in less than 4 days from the first time we spoke on the phone, we were face to face with two of the most wonderful people we’ve ever met – Dick and his wife, Holly. It was a priceless 24 hours that we spent together with them, filled with some tears, but mostly good, warm conversation and laughter. It was an uplifting experience for us as we were able to see just exactly how wonderful Brian’s gift was for them and their family. They also gave us a gift in giving us the opportunity to talk incessantly about Brian as they wanted to know him.
As many grieving experts point out, one of the most endearing things for parents who have lost a child, or for someone who has lost a sibling, is to know that their loved one will not be forgotten. Without any doubt, our Brian will forever be remembered by one of the most wonderful, loving families we have ever known. We cannot begin to express how much joy and peace that gives us after having experienced the terrible event that claimed our son. As our daughter, Katie, so aptly put it to Dick and Holly’s youngest daughter, meeting Dick and Holly did not help her in closing the door on her brother’s death, but it has opened a door on celebrating Brian’s life.
(L to R) Katie, Doug and Carol meeting their son/brother's heart recipient Dick and his wife, Holly
This is a powerful experience that has transformed both families, as I talked with Doug later there was much joy in his voice. The pain of Brian’s death will be a part of their lives forever, but being able to meet one of the recipients of Brian and their generosity gives them hope and comfort. It has also solidified their belief that in their darkest hour giving the gift of life was the right thing to do.
